Your source for satirical crypto news.
BREAKING NEWS: Judge Rules in Favor of Ripple, Serves SEC a Side of Liberty
With Judge Swanson presiding the SEC was likely doomed from the start.
Bank Customers Delighted When Mysterious New Manager Replaces All Cash with $BANK
Financial Landscape Gets Mustachioed Makeover as Unconventional Manager Challenges Traditional Banking Norms
BREAKING NEWS: Elizabeth Warren Announces “Comanche” memecoin
Coin includes a 50% Founders Fee to personally accommodate Warren “for the suffering of her people”
Ron Swanson Appointed SEC Chief; Immediately Fires Entire Department
"Ladies and gentlemen, I appreciate your efforts, but the time has come to trim the fat," Swanson stated bluntly
Ron Swanson vows not to be outdone by SNEK Energy: Seeks Private Equity Partners to create a Crypto-Powered Worldwide Bacon Distribution Network
Forget about venom filled energy drinks. We have the chance to make a real difference in the world by tokenizing bacon!
Enormous Prehistoric-Sized Horse iruncursebidoof Confused by Tiny $STABLE Ponies' Fear
Ancient $STABLE Behemoth Struggles to Bridge the Gap of Fear and Misunderstanding
Alex Becker goes all in on Cardano, moves into his wife’s boyfriend’s basement
Alex Becker, has revealed his decision to move in with his wife's boyfriend, Michael, and make a significant shift in his investment strategy towards the cryptocurrency Cardan
BREAKING NEWS: Gary Gensler tells Ron Swanson he declared Cardano a security after Charles Hoskinson declined to hire him at IOHK
Ron Swanson: I want the truth!
Gary Gensler: You can't handle the truth! The truth is Elizabeth Warren and I spend long hours and romantic evenings discussing how we can take down the whole damned decentralize crypto space!